i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
