My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
that is very illegal...i love you.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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