i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
