I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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