and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I know her cup size but not her name....
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
