some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
