But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
