so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
