I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
