Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
