You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She's the barista slut.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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