We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
