You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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