Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
