Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Randomize
