Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
