you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
