im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
