try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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