Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
