I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Randomize
