So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
