just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
