Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize