the new term for farting is butt boxing.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
