Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
