Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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