I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I need a burrito and a hug.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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