Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
