I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
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