Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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