Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
