we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
