all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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