Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
