Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I am naked and annoyed.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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