Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
