I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize