just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
So squirting runs in the family.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
