Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
