you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
The struggles of a small town man whore
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
