I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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