I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
no. you can't hotbox the world.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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