my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore