The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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