PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
