i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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