I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize