She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
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