is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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