Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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